Posted on 27. October 2016 by
It’s a bit of a rite of passage in the parenting world: the nappy change to end all nappy changes, the one that makes even the most affectionate mum or dad recoil and wonder, “What on earth have we been FEEDING this child?” It’s the dreaded poonami, and if you haven’t experienced one yet, we’re sorry, but you will soon.
The common or garden variety poonami is quite easy to identify, even from a distance: the dark stain spreading up your baby’s formerly-pristine sleepsuit is a dead giveaway. (So is the smell, but we won’t go into that here.) When you see these signs, it’s time to stop what you’re doing and get your ducks in a row: your nappy-changing acumen is about to be well and truly tested.
Here, a few tips from the trenches on how to deal with a poonami and come out the other side smelling sweet (or at least a bit better!)
- Take the whole concept of ‘be prepared’ to the next level. Once you open that nappy, anything could happen, so make sure you’re ultra-ready: this means having at least two fresh changes of clothes to hand, plus a super-sized pack of wet wipes and several clean nappies. (You may also want to install drop cloths on the walls. We’re only partly joking about this one.)
- Distractions can be key. This doesn’t tend to be quite as much an issue with newborns, but older babies are much more mobile and curious about what’s going on down there, which can easily lead to disaster when you’re coping with a poonami. Giving those little hands something else to reach for – even if you have to throw it away afterward – is usually better than letting them explore the smelly chaos that’s lurking inside that nappy.
- Don’t delay. It may be tempting to give yourself a minute to psych yourself up for what’s coming, but it’s a bit like stalling when you see cracks in a dam: it’s only going to get worse. (And don’t even ask us what happens if your 8-month-old decides to take matters into his or her own hands. The words “cot slats” and “toothbrush” will give you some idea of the consequences.)
- Learn to breathe through your mouth. Yes, it’s a stinky business, and you’ll want to fumigate afterward, but it has to be done, and you’ll do a much better job if you’re not gagging. (Someone really should have told this dad!)
- Be prepared to chuck it all in and head for the bath instead. This may apply to both of you – sometimes just getting in the shower together is the best thing you can do!
- Don’t forget... this will make a wonderful story someday. For maximum impact and revenge value, we suggest the 18th birthday party.
Have you experienced a poonami yet? Let us know your tales from the trenches – and any other great tips you have – in the comments section or on our Facebook page. You never know – you just might save another