Your baby at 17 – 18 weeks: development milestones & what to expect

We’ve been talking about rolling for a while, but it’s worth remembering that while some unicorn babies will be rolling very early, many will only just be thinking about trying it now – and some won’t do it for a while yet. All the time, though, those muscles and neurons are developing, building the ‘infrastructure’ required to get your little one moving. Keep up with tummy time and other forms of play on the floor to help them work out what they need to do to get moving. They’re also getting better at grabbing things and bringing them to their mouths – so keep their play space clear of anything that could pose a risk.

Speaking of risk, if your baby can now roll and you are used to changing their nappy on a changing table, be aware. Once they’re rolling, you can’t leave them at height for even a second, so make sure you have everything you need to change them at the table, or move nappy changes to the floor. (Once they’re rolling for real, even floor nappy changes are a minefield, with the potential every moment for them to roll a little poo trail across the floor. You’ll become an expert at doing everything one-handed while you use the other hand to hold your little one in place!)

Around now, your baby’s vision should reach full-colour – meaning they can now tell red from orange. It’s fun to play with coloured scarves, colourful balls and baby books to help engage their brains this way. In fact, it’s fun to play – full stop.

This is the perfect age for sensory play and if you can’t or don’t fancy getting to a baby sensory class, you can make a perfectly good substitute at home with a few ‘toys’ at very low cost. The deliciously scrunchable foil sheets found in first aid kits to keep you warm up a mountain make a great resource for sensory play, as does a (well supervised) bowl of water, a few bubbles, and baby-friendly lights. You could pair this with a disco light and your preferred music for the perfect sensory party. Your little one will love to see you having fun, just as much as they’ll love all the new experiences.

Your baby will be full of smiles now, and you may even get regular giggles – though it will probably be a while before the full-on baby chuckles begin. Getting a giggle out of your baby is so rewarding, and you’d be surprised what might make them laugh. Silly faces, funny noises, playful games and of course, tickles!

As your little one develops their own language skills, you might find them making their own funny noises – raspberries being a particular favourite. Conversations completely made up of raspberries – theirs and yours – are not unusual and are actually lots of fun.

Another way to ‘talk’ to your baby is through sign. Simple baby sign language uses hand gestures that your baby can learn once they’re old enough, but which they can start becoming familiar with now. Signs can be practical – things like ‘milk’ and ‘more’, ‘yes’ and ‘no’, and ‘all done’ – or they can just be for fun, like ‘elephant’ or ‘giraffe’.

Sing and sign classes are a fun way to learn these signs, or you can find plenty of baby signing videos online. As well as using the signs when you ask your baby questions, you can also incorporate them into your story time for a more playful retelling. Channel your inner CBeebies presenter and take on something like Dear Zoo – you’ll be amazed how much your little one enjoys these dramatic renditions!

Rhythms and routines at this stage

Your baby’s tummy is bigger now, which means they can take in more milk with each feed. Technically, they could probably go for longer periods between feeds and maybe even overnight. However, your reality might look quite different.

Your little one is probably having 3 – 4 naps per day by now, ranging between 30 minutes and an hour and a half. Typically their longest nap is in the morning – at which time you probably don’t feel like catching up on some sleep yourself – but they might be ready for their long overnight sleep by 7pm which at least gives you a bit more of an evening. You might not want to go to bed early, preferring to have some actual grown-up time with your partner (or with the sofa!), but try to be sensible. You need your sleep. Particularly if that 4-month sleep regression is still kicking your butt.

Teething

If it’s not one thing, it’s another. Symptoms of teething may also be kicking your butt right now, if your little one is being troubled by incoming incisors. In fact, it’s usually the front teeth that come through first – bottom, then top – but either way, it can be very uncomfortable for your baby, and very disruptive to you, too. Teeth are present in your baby’s gums from before they are born, but they wait to descend until you’re beginning to feel like you’ve got a hold on parenting. And then, they come.

In all seriousness, your little one is going to need those teeth, so this is another one of those painful but necessary experiences. You might notice hot, red cheeks, a sore bottom, a lot of chewing and dribbling, plus some (or a lot of) irritability. All of these are signs of teething. Give your baby something cool and safe to chew on, whether that’s a teething toy or a cool, damp cloth, and it’s ok to give them some baby paracetamol if they need it to help ease the pain.

Sleep training

If you’ve had 18 weeks of disturbed sleep, you might be ready to think about sleep training. This is a personal decision, and not something you should feel talked into if it doesn’t feel right to you. Your little one feeds on your mood, so if you’re worried – they’ll worry too.

Before you try anything else, try to detach feeding from sleeping, as it’s easy for babies to conflate the two. That might mean that when they wake in the night, they automatically want to be fed back to sleep, even if they’re not hungry – giving you a disturbed night. Breastfed babies may feel this even more strongly. Try having the non-feeding parent resettle them and see if that makes a difference.

If this doesn’t help, do some research about different sleep training methods and find a solution (or a mix of solutions) that feels comfortable to you. Bear in mind your baby is still very little at this age and it might be you just need to wait a bit longer for them to be developmentally ready to fall asleep alone.

You are done with vaccinations for now, and you won’t have a routine health visitor appointment for some time. However, young babies are still developing their immune system and are likely to fall ill, so you’ll probably still be back and forth to the health centre. Don’t worry – this is how their immune system develops. Welcome to the emotional rollercoaster of childhood illnesses.

Do you feel like you’ve settled into this new normal? Your world has likely been turned upside down by your baby, and all the things you used to pride yourself on – whether that was your career, your beautiful home, your organisation, your style – may feel like they’ve fallen to the wayside a bit.

This is so normal, but that doesn’t make it feel ok. There may be days where you wonder where the ‘old’ you has gone. Talk to your fellow parents and they’ll likely say the same. However wonderful this new life is, it’s a stark change.

Coping with this transition is not a simple exercise. It’s ongoing work that is worth doing in good company. Be honest with yourself, your friends and your partner about how this transition is affecting you – and see how you can keep hold of your old self through the occasional day out without your baby (or hour out, depending what you’re dealing with!), or in therapy or a group setting, or just by doing something you used to enjoy before your baby came along. Above all, remind yourself: you still matter. Your dreams and ambitions are still important. And on the other side of this all-consuming part of parenting, you will want to claim some of that old life back.

Developmental milestones are guides – not deadlines. If your baby isn’t ‘keeping up’ with your friends’ babies, it isn’t an immediate cause for concern. Every child develops at their own pace. That being said, your health visitor and GP are there to support you with any queries you might have and will always be happy to see you with your baby if you have any worries.