Your baby at 17 months: development milestones & what to expect

Your active toddler is quite the explorer, climbing furniture, stairs, playground equipment, tree stumps, and whatever else is within reach. If you have an especially adventurous child, it’s definitely worth giving that energy some direction so that they can apply it safely and under observation – otherwise, they’ll look for their own adventures!

Walking may have progressed to running, walking backwards, and perhaps even jumping – though jumping with two feet off the ground usually comes a bit later. Your little one probably has favourite places where they like to go, so make the most of those outdoor adventures to practice their skills and give those muscles a stretch.

In the house, toys you can roll or ride on are great for the kind of big adventurous play your little one needs on a rainy day. But you’ll also find they’re interested in ‘quieter’ activities (though they won’t necessarily do them quietly!) like looking at books with you, or mark-making with chunky crayons or water pens.

Ever wished your toddler came with volume control? You’re not alone. Despite the sensitivity of children’s hearing, they don’t seem to be bothered by their own screeching, and screeching is the name of the game right now. Also squealing, screaming, squeaking – anything high-pitched, basically. This is partly a way of experimenting with their own voice – i.e. learning what they can do with it. But it’s also a way of experimenting with you. What happens when they scream?

One thing we all know about toddlers – saying ‘no’ doesn’t have much of an impact. Which is not to say don’t do it – it’s an important part of their learning. But alongside saying no, try different things, like dropping your voice to a whisper, or explaining that the loud voice hurts your ears. It’s good practice to explain your ‘no’s anyway – but adding in some fun, like a whisper, might encourage your child to join you at a much lower volume. You can pretend you’ve got some fun secrets to share.

Meanwhile, alongside the screaming, they’re also picking up new words all the time. They might be putting new word combinations together, or persisting with single words emphasised in a thousand different ways. Either way, they’re also understanding you better – meaning that ‘no’ is being heard and understood, even if it’s not being obeyed.

Your baby loves to imitate you, and now that they’re on the move this might also extend to copying the things you’re doing, as well as what you’re saying. You can encourage this skill with turn taking – for example, when they’re in the bath you might say ‘I’ll wash this leg, then you can wash that leg’ and let them crack on with the sponge. Or get them involved in clearing up – ‘I’ll pick up the red blocks; you pick up the yellow blocks’. They might even like to pick up the vacuum cleaner and do some hoovering! (A good reason to choose a lightweight vacuum!)

This is also an age where children develop more significant attachments to toys. You might have noticed that your little one has always sought some sensory stimulation from clothes or soft muslins, for example, when sucking their thumb or falling asleep. They might now choose a soft toy that feels just right as their constant companion. Don’t fight it – this kind of attachment is normal and healthy and will provide them with comfort when you’re not around. It might be worth getting a spare, though, for those days when that special toy needs a wash or can’t be found in time for bed. And of course do intervene if you’re worried that their ‘lovey’ of choice is interfering with their development.

Rhythms and routines at this stage

Your little one needs around 11 – 14 hours sleep per day, including daytime naps. How is your toddler doing with their sleep ? Some children go to bed no problem, but wake up with the sun, meaning everyone in the house is awake about two hours earlier than they want to be. Some children really fight bedtime, leaving their parents to keep popping in and out of their room for hours every night with no real time left for themselves of an evening – but at least they don’t wake up until 7am. Other children go to sleep late and still get up early – hopefully those families at least get a decent nap during the day. The point is, 11 – 14 hours of sleep on paper looks like plenty, but in reality, it can be hard work on the adults in the house. No wonder you’re exhausted.

Appetite changes

Babies that ate anything can still turn into fussy toddlers. This feels very unfair, given the work you put into giving them a wide range of healthy food choices during the weaning stage. But it’s a natural stage, partly about asserting their control and partly to do with developing wariness around new flavours and textures.

Try not to react negatively when your child starts showing a preference for specific foods and rejecting others. Continue to offer the foods you want them to eat alongside something they consider ‘safe’ and keep a neutral attitude about it all. Trying to force them to eat things they don’t want will only end in pushback that could have a much longer-lasting effect than this temporary ‘picky’ eating.

It’s also worth noting that your toddler is no longer physically growing at the same rate they were a few months ago, so their appetite has actually reduced. A few tips:

Often around this age, people will start asking, ‘are you thinking of having another one?’ or, more presumptuously, ‘when are you having another one?’

It’s nobody else’s business whether you and your partner are planning on expanding your family and there are hundreds of good reasons why you might not want to talk about it. But even those reasons are often more than you want to share with some random at the park. So, for a bit of fun, here are some suggestions for things to say when someone asks you that question:

In all seriousness, these kinds of questions are currently inevitable but that doesn’t mean they always will be. Don’t feel obliged to share your plans with anyone outside your circle of trust just for the sake of social niceties. Sometimes it’s good to remind people of the concept of personal boundaries!

Developmental milestones are guides – not deadlines. If your toddler isn’t ‘keeping up’ with your friends’ toddlers, it isn’t an immediate cause for concern. Every child develops at their own pace. That being said, your health visitor and GP are there to support you with any queries you might have and will always be happy to see you with your child if you have any worries.