Demystifying play with your baby

As parents we are continually doing our best, trying to fit everything in to the modern demands of society. The world around our babies is ever changing and evolving; however, child development has remained the same. The most basic things – talking, singing and playing with your baby – still remain the best things to support your child’s development, but it can be a daunting thing to start for many new parents.

Historically, humans evolved in a communal context where parents had lots of support from wider family and the community. Even in more recent history there was access to more facilities such as family groups and parenting support, which due to lack of funding have closed or privatised in many areas. Now a days, this lack of support or ‘village’ means that stress, time constraints and every day demands can impact on our capacity to emotionally connect, play and spend 1:1 time with our babies and children. It can sometimes feel like the last thing on the list. We are tired. We still have all the same things to do, but we’re doing them without the ‘village’ they say it takes to raise a child.

Despite best intentions, this lack of wider communal support can mean that by the time the daily jobs have been completed, work is done and other siblings cared for, there is little energy left in the tank for thinking about playing with your baby.

Not only this, but quite often parents don’t really know where to begin. It’s cliché to say, but babies aren’t born with a manual! I always say I wouldn’t try to cut my child’s hair because I wouldn’t know where to begin, and yet we expect parents to be in an appropriate place to feel empowered to support their child’s development through play from day one!

Another reason why play can often be difficult to initiate is that parents find it difficult to know what toys are age appropriate for a baby and actually what to do with them. You may or may not have had a parent who modelled this to you, so it can feel very new territory if you don’t have the back catalogue of connection and play with a baby to pull upon. Many adults find that when we play with older children it’s easier in one way as they will take the lead, guide the play and we can clearly take on a role. For example, having a teddy’s bears picnic or rolling cars down a ramp.

However, playing with a baby can be extremely daunting – especially in the early days when we don’t get much back from them. As a busy mum of two and founder of My Mummy Teacher, I know only too well how hard it can be to find your rhythm when it comes to playing with your baby. You may still be recovering from birth on top of all the other things mentioned above. But the good news is, little and often is key!

For your baby the world is brand new. That in itself is a sensory experience. You can harness this to use the everyday to provide play experiences for your baby.

Here are my top tips for prioritising play with your baby: