Parenting Q&A with Connor Kern

I think sometimes people underestimate just how much dads want to be involved in those early months. There’s this idea that mums naturally take the lead and dads sort of orbit around that, but for a lot of us it’s not like that at all.

Those early months are such a huge bonding time. Whether it’s the night feeds, changing nappies at 3am, or just walking around the house trying to settle a baby that won’t sleep, those moments matter to dads just as much.

For me, being involved from the very start helped me build a real connection with my kids. It made me feel like I wasn’t just watching it all happen, I was part of it.

It’s really important to me.

Feeding is one of those moments where everything slows down for a minute. You’re holding them close, they’re looking up at you, and it’s just a quiet little pocket of time together.

It’s such a simple thing, but it’s a time where you’re fully present with them and nothing else really matters.

It also helped Charlotte a lot. Parenting works best when you feel like you’re sharing the load rather than one person carrying everything.

I think the biggest difference is that I’m calmer now, I definitely have a lot more patience and realise that the “tough times” don’t last and will actually miss them.

With your first child everything feels huge. You question every decision and worry about whether you’re doing things “right”. By the time your third comes along, you realise that a lot of parenting is about learning as you go and trusting yourself a bit more.

I’m definitely more relaxed now. I enjoy the little moments more because I know how quickly they pass.

With Sophia, I was learning. With Penelope, I feel like I’m soaking it all in.

Charlotte is incredibly thoughtful.

She really cares about how the kids feel and making sure they feel heard and understood.

She has this calm way about her with the kids that I really admire. Even when things feel chaotic, she has this ability to slow everything down and meet them where they are emotionally.

Watching her with them is something I’m really proud of.

Honestly, a lot of it comes down to communication and just being aware of each other.

Some days one of us has more energy than the other, and we try to recognise that. If Charlotte’s had a long day with the kids, I’ll take over where I can. And on the days where I’m feeling a bit overwhelmed with work or everything else, she steps in the same way.

Sometimes it’s the small things, making a cup of tea, giving each other half an hour to breathe, or just saying “I’ve got this”.

Parenting is definitely a team effort.

It’s something I’m always trying to get better at.

Because my work revolves around content creation and social media, it can easily blur into family time. But I try to remind myself why I started doing what I do in the first place, it was always about capturing memories, but I’m careful to not miss the moments trying to capture them.

So I try to be present when I’m with them. Phones down, distractions away, just being there with the kids.

The balance isn’t perfect, but I’m always trying to prioritise the moments that matter most.

With three kids it can be tricky, but it’s something I really value.

Each of them is so different, and they all need slightly different things from you as a parent.

Sometimes it’s something simple like spending time with Sophia when she’s doing her hair, taking Brody out for a ride on his bike, doing school runs together, or sitting down and playing a game together, Those little moments of one-on-one time help them feel seen as individuals.

And as a parent, it’s nice to have those moments where you’re fully focused on just one of them.

Family support has made a huge difference for us.

Even something small like someone popping round for an hour so you can catch your breath or get a bit of sleep can feel massive in those early months.

But honestly, emotional support matters just as much. Just having people around you who remind you that you’re doing a good job when you’re doubting yourself.

Parenting can feel overwhelming sometimes, and those little bits of encouragement go a long way.

I think that feeling is more common than people realise.

Your whole world shifts overnight and suddenly everything revolves around this tiny little person who needs you for everything. It’s beautiful, but it can also feel overwhelming.

What helped me was remembering that the phase doesn’t last forever. The sleepless nights, the chaos, the feeling like you’re running on empty, it changes.

And little by little you start finding pieces of yourself again, just in a slightly different version of life.

It’s usually the quiet moments.

When one of the kids falls asleep on you. When they randomly hug you. Or when they laugh at something silly and you realise you’re the reason they’re smiling.

Those moments happen in between all the chaos and noise of family life, and they remind you what it’s all for.

It’s easy to get caught up in the busy parts of parenting, but those little pockets of joy make everything worth it.

I’d hope they feel loved.

A lot of the reason I share our family life is because I want to capture these moments while they’re happening. One day the kids will grow up and those memories will mean a lot.

If they ever look back at the content, I’d want them to see how proud I am of them and how much they mean to me.

At the end of the day, everything I do is for them.